The J. Margaret Weaver Journal

What Makes a Great Leader? Four Fundamental Traits that May Surprise You

What Makes a Great Leader? Four Fundamental Traits that May Surprise You

Photo by Matteo Vistocco on Unsplash

What are you going to write next?

This was the last question during an interview for an article about the book I published in 2017. Prior to this, one of my lifetime goals was writing a book. After three years of writing and editing; pausing and restarting; I had not thought about writing anything beyond this book. At that moment, it wouldn’t hurt my feelings to never spend another Saturday writing again. I was also six months pregnant with my first child and focused on birthing my real baby instead of another book baby. No. More. Writing.

Compelled for an answer; however, I shared a couple ideas for future books, one of them being about the transition to one’s first leadership role. This phase of my life stands out for me as a particularly painful time. Transitioning from an individual contributor to a leader and a manager of people is challenging; you have to completely change not only your mindset at work but also the mindset of how other people interact with you. I struggled with this transition for a couple years and only made it through by leaning on mentors and colleagues at work as well as professors and peers in my MBA program, as well as a few good writers and thought leaders for guidance on how to become a good (ideally great) leader, especially at a young age. I'd also be remiss to not mention the grace that many people gave me as I learned to lead.

I’ve thought about this topic off and on over the past few years, debating on the timing to tackle another book (Baby #2 was born almost three years ago, and  the idea of starting book baby #2 is even less appealing now than it was two years ago when I write the first version of this article). Instead of diving into another book during this season of life, I decided to start a four-part miniseries to preview the content that I’ve been reflecting on for new leaders. This seems more manageable, it gets the content into the hands of people who are in that season of life, and it opens the door for comments and feedback - both of which I’d love to hear.

As I reflected on all the feedback and learning I had during my transition to a leader and a manager of people, there were four themes that emerged: Character, Credibility, Caring, and Connection. I’ll explore each theme in depth one week at a time; right now, I want to explain what I mean by each and why each is important. Also, I want to clarify that while you do not need to manage people to be a leader, if you are managing people, you should also be a leader. While they are two separate things, both are important.  These traits have also been heavy on my mind as habits I have lost sight of between COVID, working from home, having small children, feeling the constant pull of too much to do and never enough time to do it, and a personal lack of intentionality to shift how I live these traits out daily.  Virtues rarely surface without a plan or an intent to pursue that path, and I will be the first to admit that I've let these go for a variety of reasons.  Consider this my own self-checkup. 

Character defines character as “the mental and moral qualities distinctive to an individual”. I'd take it further and think about defining it as someone who has integrity, virtue, or perhaps high standards of behavior.  As a leader, you must be intentional about defining and exemplifying your character. How do you want people to describe you? Is that the kind of person you would want to follow? Can people predict how you will behave based on your past behavior? The best leaders I’ve worked with have character traits like integrity, transparency, and authenticity. There are many more attributes that make up their character, but these three are fundamental to a healthy leader and team or organization.


Leaders can gain credibility with others when they actively listen to others and take the time to learn how things work, either by doing the work themselves or spending the time to ask questions and gain a deep understanding of the work by the people doing it. This is especially important when a leader wants to institute changes to a team or organization.  The idea might be amazing - but if the leader lacks credibility, the implementation will often fail.


Great leaders care about people. Period. That doesn’t mean they are pushovers or avoid tough decisions; sometimes caring about people means making extraordinarily challenging decisions that unfavorably impact some people for the overall good of the organization. During these times, leaders who care about people will execute the decision in a way that shows their humility, conscientiousness, and empathy for others.


Of these four themes, I personally struggled with connection the most. As someone who is competitive and can become laser-focused on finishing the thing in front of me, I tend to focus too much on accomplishing things and not enough on connecting with people. Through feedback from others and by gaining a deeper understanding of myself and my flaws, I have found joy in connecting with people and building relationships with them. One question interview candidates often ask me is what my favorite thing is about my employer, and I always tell them it’s the people. Connecting with people, understanding where they are in life and with work, and finding ways to help make their lives better is part of my “why” and is so important for leaders to practice.

Join me each week as we explore these four themes in depth with stories, examples, and resources to help you wherever you are in your leadership journey. And, as I mentioned, I’d love to hear your thoughts and feedback.

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Laura Thomas on the Psychology of Mental Health, Motherhood, and Reinventing Her Career

Laura Thomas on the Psychology of Mental Health, Motherhood, and Reinventing Her Career

To say "mental health" has been a buzzword the past two years may be a understatement. There is so much that could be unpacked within this simple phrase, and probably just as many opinions about how to improve your mental health.

Whether in your professional or personal sphere, I think that most, if not all people would say that talking more about our mental health is a positive. To add flavor to this conversation, I asked Laura Thomas, a psychology instructor with a background in leadership development and counseling, to share some of the themes that she teaches as well as tips on when to seek help, how to better navigate conflict, and how she came back to the workforce after pausing to stay home with her three children. Our conversation is interesting, thought-provoking, and science/research based from a psychology perspective. She also debunks some of the common "pop psychology" that is out there that isn't based in the actual science or research of psychology - who knew?

Listen to our conversation on Apple, Spotify, and Anchor.

Recommended Resources Mentioned in this Episode:

Maybe You Should Talk to Someone by Lori Gottlieb

Psychology Today

Tuesdays with Morrie by Mitch Albom

StrengthsFinder / Living Your Strengths

About Laura Thomas

Laura Thomas is currently an instructor of Psychology at Central Washington University. She teaches Introduction to Psychology as well as Psychology of Adjustment. She is writing a textbook for her adjustment class this year. Laura was a Career Counselor at Texas State University and Southern Methodist University. She also taught leadership classes as the Assistant Director of the Leadership Center at Texas State University.

Laura was raised all over the world as an army BRAT. The traveling helped create her love for people and learning from others. She married her high school sweetheart and they currently live in Sammamish, Washington with their three children. The family loves to spend their time visiting national parks, camping, hiking, anything outdoors.

She received a Bachelor of Science at Kansas State University with a double major in Life Sciences and Psychology. Her Masters degree was from Texas State University with a focus on Counseling Psychology.

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From Sketches to the Store: Where Your Favorite J. Margaret Weaver Pieces Come From

From Sketches to the Store: Where Your Favorite J. Margaret Weaver Pieces Come From

Did you know it can take a year or more to go from a croquis or a "quick sketch" of a design to delivering the final production order? While I remember learning about fast fashion giants in business school that consolidate this timeline down into about six weeks (an interesting, though different, business model); small batch, independent designers like J. Margaret Weaver take a different approach.

Right now, I'm toggling between real life where it's Summer 2022 and work life where I'm preparing as far ahead as Fall 2023.  Planning so far ahead can be disorienting; while I have to envision timelines and events and demand for Spring and Fall 2023, I'm also reminded that it's still June 2022 when I want to sign a check with the wrong year.

Coming from the healthcare industry, I had no idea how detailed and labor-intensive it was to bring a design to life.  That said, the process is always fresh and fun because it brings together creativity, functionality and inspiration with your feedback.  For those of you who have completed a design survey or tried on a sample, your commentary has been invaluable toward bringing an initial idea to fruition.

If you're like me and curious how an idea ultimately becomes a piece of clothing in a store, read on or listen on Spotify, Apple, and Anchor. for the 411.

Gather Inspiration: For me, inspiration comes from observing others and asking questions like:  What are other women wearing and why? What types of fabric or prints translate best with what they are wearing? What practical needs does our customer have, and how can we meet those in a unique yet pragmatic way?  We also send out design surveys with questions about preferred fabrics, fit, and design so that we are making something that you want.

Sketch the Design: Officially called a croquis, the sketch includes a rough draft of the front and back of the design, along with a written description to add clarity for the patternmaker.  

Introductory Meeting with Patternmaker: We discuss the sketches, fabric, trim, and purpose of the design.  For example, we may talk about how a dress should hang on different body types, how a top will likely be worn under something which informs the fit and fabric, or how we can make pants with as flexible an inseam as possible to allow for minimal alterations.  

Tweak 3D Design: Before creating a physical sample, the patternmaker creates a 3D mockup on an avatar.  This allows us to tweak the lines of the design without wasting resources on a physical sample - a huge cost and time savings.

Physical Samples: Once the 3D design is finished, we test multiple rounds of samples on a fit model and show them to other women for feedback.  Fun fact: the samples are always in white or ivory fabric so fit or design issues are apparent and fixed prior to production. 

Create Final Samples: Once the initial sampling process is complete, it's time to give the final "sew by" sample (similar to a "go by" in the business or engineering world) to our atelier to create samples in the production fabric.  We evaluate these samples for fit and design as well.

Open Pre-Sale and Wholesale Orders: The most impactful step in bringing you high-quality, ethically-made in the USA clothing at an attainable price is our pre-sale and wholesale ordering step.  We open pre-sales for one week to allow our customers to order the exact the colors and sizes they want prior to production.  Our wholesale customers (e.g., boutiques) do the same.  This allows us to more precisely pinpoint demand and reduce wasted costs from ordering too much of a particular color or making too much in the wrong sizes.  The best part is that this translates to better fiscal stewardship for us, and we can pass this benefit along in our pricing.

Start Production: Finally there! Once orders are in, we procure fabric and trim, and coordinate with our atelier in Kansas City to bring everything to life!  We also finalize the name of each piece, interview the honoree, coordinate a photoshoot, and start working on sketches and patterns for the next two seasons.  Whew!

Ship Orders and Post Webstock: The best step, by far! We pick up the orders downtown from the atelier, pack them, and ship everything out to our amazing customers and stores.  This is by far the most surreal step for me as I imagine and anticipate the many memories and events you will experience in your pieces. 


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Lisa Caras on effective decision making, balancing career & family, and building personal discipline

Lisa Caras on effective decision making, balancing career & family,  and building personal discipline

I met Lisa Caras when we were both undergrads at Miami of Ohio.  We were both in the business school, members of a business fraternity, and were part of a group of close friends.  One thing that always stood out about Lisa was her discipline and ability to focus - from the time I met her at 19 or 20 years old, she prioritized the things that matter and focused on preparing herself for the future, even if that meant a Friday night at home studying or going to bed early to be ready for an exam the next day.  She's always been mature and wise, and it was edifying for me to sit down with her now, 15 or so years after we met, to dig in to how she's approached her career, education, and life.  I think you'll feel the same.

Join me as I sit down with Lisa, now a mom of two young kids, wife, and marketing manager for her family-owned business - Jones Dairy Farm - about being a strategy consultant in the Big Apple, why she decided to go back to business school and how she picked NYU, and how she keeps things going at work, home, and in between.  Lisa holds a high degree of excellence and expectations for herself, and she shares advice and experiences she's had that have been instrumental in shaping her along the way.

 Listen on Spotify, Apple, and Anchor.

 About Lisa Caras:

Lisa Caras is a 7th generation family member at Jones Dairy Farm, a premium breakfast meats company located in Fort Atkinson, WI. She joined the family business in 2017 after working in finance at Intel and consulting at IBM. She holds a BA from Miami University (OH) and an MBA from New York University. Lisa lives in Madison, WI with her husband and two children.


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The "Story Behind the Seams" - Connie & Malachi

The "Story Behind the Seams" - Connie & Malachi

When we received a "Name a Design" nomination from Connie for her son Malachi, the words of a proud mom resonated with us.  After further contemplation of name options for our latest collection, we decided to secretly reach out to Malachi.  Through this, we learned more about the sacrifices his mom had made for him and his desire to recognize his mom.  It became clear from our conversation, that we were going to name the shirt Connie to honor the example she's made for her son, and we couldn't be more excited to do so! 

As a thank you, Connie will receive a gift of her namesake shirt (she picked the pink floral print - our most popular so far)!

I'll be doing a podcast interview with Connie this summer - stay tuned to hear more of her story and her tips for success in life, work, and motherhood.

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Is Your Network Really Your Net Worth, Part 2: An Amazing Debt-Free Story with Adam Trafton

Is Your Network Really Your Net Worth, Part 2: An Amazing Debt-Free Story with Adam Trafton
A few months ago, I published a podcast episode that took a critical look at the saying and the philosophy that "your network is your net worth." This generated a lot of conversation and feedback, and I enjoyed hearing stories from people about their financial journeys, financial literacy, and sometimes the lack of education or transparency they had with respect to personal finances as they were growing up and some of the challenges this created later in life.
One of my colleagues and friends, Adam Trafton, reached out and shared some of the details about his debt-free journey.  It was such an inspiration, I asked if he would join me for an interview to share how and why he paid off his debt so quickly (he paid off $70,000 in student loans and car loan debt in five months!) as well as what he's learned about personal finances and some of the common pitfalls many people find themselves in.  Finally, we wrap up with the fun that comes with building wealth and using that wealth to be outrageously generous with other people!  We agreed that the best part of being financially secure was the ability to give to people and causes that are important to you.

Listen on Spotfiy, Apple, and Anchor.

Finally, I want to add a disclaimer that we are not giving any financial advice nor are we licensed financial experts. Adam shares resources and a program that worked well for him, and encourages you to do the same.  We recognized that everyone is at a different place in their financial journey, and this is an opportunity to hear how he changed his behaviors around spending and saving to reach specific financial goals.  Your goals might be the same and they might be different, and I welcome productive, thoughtful dialogue and discussion.  
About Mr. Trafton 
Vice President & Area Chief Resource Officer | Wisconsin

Adam Trafton is the Vice President and Area Chief Resource Officer serving Ascension Wisconsin. In his role, Adam has responsibility for planning, developing, leading, and implementing all measures needed to manage non-labor spend, with a specific emphasis on  supply chain. He is also responsible for determining the best approach to control supply and non-labor spend through facilitation of utilization strategies with physicians and clinicians and managing change related to supply and non-labor spend within The Resource Group Wisconsin market.

Adam, previously served as a Director in The Resource Group Deployment Community where he specialized in strategic financial consulting and Group Purchasing Organization (GPO) integration. He has completed 48 healthcare GPO Participant integrations with The Resource Group and is an experienced supply chain and change management leader.

Adam came to The Resource Group from PwC where he supported both audit and tax practices. He has more than 13 years of experience in both private and public sectors, including executive leadership, public accounting, healthcare operations, project management, consulting, supply chain and analytics.

Adam earned his bachelor’s degree in business administration and his master’s degree in accounting from the Richard A. Chaifetz School of Business at Saint Louis University. Adam is also a licensed Certified Public Accountant (CPA).




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Let's Go "Behind the Seams" of our Newest Collection: Prints, Petal Sleeves, and Personalization

Let's Go "Behind the Seams" of our Newest Collection: Prints, Petal Sleeves, and Personalization


What Inspired our Newest Collection?

A serendipitous find of our first print, multiple requests from you for petal sleeves, and my search for personalized stationary.

A chance encounter with a local fabric store led me to find this Tula floral print.  After receiving a ton of comments about it on social media, I did some digging and learned that it's from a local (KC) designer, made from 100% cotton (and machine washable), and would sew up beautifully in our new Connie petal sleeve top.  It was quite the last-minute add, and when I saw the sample, I couldn't wait to try it on!

Our Connie petal Sleeve top has a similar fit to the Mimi with a slightly looser neckline and drape-y petal sleeves that are feminine yet offer a slightly longer sleeve for a more flattering look.  Along with the new print, we're bringing the purple from the Mimi back for this top, along with a bright coral.  We'll also have it in three staple colors - ivory, black, and navy.

Our Barbara dress is also back and in new colors: cream and pine green, and with a few tweaks, including a shorter back zipper and a two inch higher slit than last year (thank you all for the feedback)!  I've already talked to many of you interested in the cream for a rehearsal dinner or graduation ceremony, and the pine green for fall and holiday events - this is the perfect dress for any and all of these occasions!  Both of the new colors come in the same TENCEL fabric as the first round of Barbara dresses, and the colors look absolutely gorgeous. 

For those of you who missed getting a Barbara in Bordeaux, Nightfall Blue, or Black, we will open up pre-orders for these colors, too, so you can guarantee the color and size you want now, prior to production.  A a thank you for pre-ordering, we will discount pre-orders by 15%, so the Barbara dress will be $148.75 (vs. $175 regular price) and the Connie top will be $72.25 (vs. $85). 

We will make web stock online once production is complete later this summer, though I would encourage you to pre-order if you know you want a particular color and size that sold out fast last year.


How Will Pre-Orders Work?

We'll open up pre-orders from April 30 - May 7 for the Connie petal sleeve top and the Barbara dress for every color.  Pre-orders will be discounted at 15% as a thank you for helping us reduce waste and practice good financial stewardship.  As always, we have a 100% satisfaction guarantee, so you can return your pre-ordered items if you don't love them.  Pre-orders will be shipped later this summer (about ten weeks after pre-orders close), and any remaining inventory will be available online to shop at that time.

Personalized Stationary

My personal quest for stationary with bright colors (perhaps inspiration from the Tula print?) and a fun yet simple design led me to start designing it myself.  What's better than fun snail mail to brighten someone's day?  Personalize a set of eight flat cards or folded cards for yourself or someone you love, and spread some cheer.  

Each set is printed to order with your selection of name or monogram and colors.  Sets come with eight cards and envelopes, and come ready to give as a gift, just in time for upcoming holidays and events, including Administrative Professionals Day (April 27), Mother's Day (May 7), graduations and wedding season.

Our personalized stationary launches on Wednesday, April 20, and for a limited time, enjoy 50% off your second set of stationary when you order one at full price.  Use code JMW at checkout for this discount.

I cannot wait to share more of this new collection with you! Thank you, as always, for being here. 



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Aim to Do the Right Things

Aim to Do the Right Things

I shared last week on social media that the theme for that week had been "too much to do". That was the case not only for me, but also for a number of people I talked to across all walks of life; this sense of having too many priorities to work on, problems to solve, or fire drills to put out.

Books on time management, productivity, and organization routinely top best-seller lists, with the message that this way of managing your time, improving your focus, or taking breaks will be the catalyst needed to help you organize and manage your time.  I think there is value to these time / energy "optimization" methods, to being organized, and to finding what works for you.  But it goes beyond that.

The other day, I RSVP'd for a wedding online rather than through the mail for the first time. Once I clicked a couple boxes, I immediately had the option to visit the couple's registry and send a gift.  Two minutes later, the gift was en route to them.  Ten years ago, this same task would have taken an hour or two of my time; I would have sent a reply back in the mail and then taken the time to go to an actual store where I printed off a gift registry and wandered the aisles deciding what to give the couple.  Then I would have purchased the gift, perhaps wrapped it, and delivered/shipped/or dropped it off at the reception. 

What astonished me most about that experience was the realization that so many things have become faster and easier, and yet many of us still have more to do than there are hours in the day.

I thought about it.  I talked to people about it.  Why was this happening, and how could we think about our time and energy differently?  

I realized there are two aspects to all of this - there's the "capacity" side of how you have the focus, time, and energy to get things done (and what many people think about when it comes to time management) and then there's the "input/output" side, which is determining what you want to accomplish and how you'll accomplish it in the best way.  This is the aspect that isn't given as much attention, but is just as important.  Here are four tips to help you aim to do the right things.

1. What you say yes to is just as important as what you say no to.  It's important to start with a clear definition of what is most important and what activities contributes to your measure of success.  For example, if you own a business, net income is one of the common measures of success, so it's important to understand what activities most favorably impact net income (while not coming at any ethical expense, of course) and then to focus on doing those activities and measuring the results of them compared to what results you expect. 

Over the past six months, I've said "no" to a lot of things for myself and my family when I realized that I wasn't getting the results on the metrics or measures that are important to me.  One simple example: I signed my kids up for too many activities last fall and it was negatively impacting our time, energy, and behavior (lots of whining, stress, and tantrums).  We moved to one activity per kid per season for now and added independent playtime to give them more space to decompress.  Another example: some of my growth ideas for J. Margaret Weaver were inappropriate based on our business stage so I adjusted my growth timeline which allowed me to let go of some unnecessary work right now and to focus on what matters in the next quarter rather than a year from now.  I've adjusted my approach to consulting projects to simplify the work while still yielding the same or better results, I've delayed superfluous projects around my house (and finally brought in an expert to help me refresh my office), and I even let go of a strong opinion I had on a particular situation that was zapping my energy and time as I tried to build my case for why I was right.  I realized that it didn't matter enough.

While it can be incredibly challenging or look different in practice when leading a team of people or in a situation where it seems like you have to say yes, it's all about coming back to defining what actually matters and how can you accomplish what actually matters in the simplest way possible.  That might mean tuning out some of the noise that accompanies the topic, fostering a relationship so you can set better boundaries in the future, or having some white space to identify the items that actually matter and create specific plans around them.

2. Identify and use constraints to your advantage.  We face constraints and tradeoffs every day.  Time, resources, energy, production capacity, and cash flow are all common constraints that can thwart a plan and require creativity to pivot.  Can't get a meeting with a key decision-maker for four weeks but you need to finalize something in two weeks? Try a different route - whether that's another communication method (texting, email, dinner, breakfast, hallway conversation) or another decision-maker (can that person delegate decision-making authority to someone else or to you? The answer isn't to just throw up your hands and delay the project or to try and eliminate every constraint, it's to work within your constraints to find a creative solution.

3. The shortest distance between two points is a straight line.  Not only is it a math fundamental, it's also good planning.  The more comprehensive a plan is from the beginning, the straighter the line will be from concept to completion.  How do you get a comprehensive plan? Start with what you know and pull in experts to help build it out further.  Validate the plan with anyone who has decision-making authority or an impact on the outcome to ensure you heard then correctly and implemented their feedback.  Finally, test to see if you really need to do something a particular way - perhaps it could be accomplished in two steps rather than five or in a day rather than a week.

4. Practice good stewardship of your time and energy.  I started changing my approach to staying organized and managing my time when I framed it as practicing good personal stewardship.  I steward my time and energy so I can give the right amount to the people and opportunities that are important to me.  That might mean going to bed early, taking a short break, getting a babysitter for a date night, pulling in more resources to help with a project, or not doing activities that you, my wonderful customers, do not value and therefore I should not be doing.  This approach has helped me avoid the trappings of feeling guilty or that I must justify how I am spending my time, as I'm aligning it with a bigger vision and definition of what it means to steward my time.


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Want to be a more engaging public speaker? Try these three tips.

Want to be a more engaging public speaker? Try these three tips.

Growing up, I loved speaking and performing in front of an audience.  Whether that was through ballet, singing in my church choir, or community/school theatre productions, I had zero fear on stage.

Until my senior year of college.

What happened? My senior finance capstone included a group project and presentation that accounted for 50% of my grade.  Unfortunately, the rest of my group had a bad case of "senioritis" (IKYK), which resulted in a bit of an unbalanced workload for our research, writing, and presentation.  After a week of Starbucks Red Eyes to give me energy amidst the presentation prep along with everything else going on the last semester of my senior year, I was wiped out mentally and physically.  I remember almost forgetting breakfast in my rush to get to class early, and I ate a couple bites of cereal as I ran out the door.

My exhaustion, coupled with adrenaline from the presentation pressure low blood sugar was a dangerous combination.  I passed out in front of my class (thankfully caught by a proactive ROTC student who was sitting in the front row) and developed a terrible fear of public speaking.  I managed my fear by being a "safe" presenter (read: the most boring presenter possible).  I read from slides, I never deviated off script, and I stuck to the facts.

Over the years, as I worked through my fear of getting up in front of an audience, I was challenged by a leader at work who told me that I had to become a more engaging and confident speaker if I wanted to advance further.  While this was the worst feedback I could have gotten (having to tackle a huge fear) I took the advice to heart and engaged a lot of people for perspective, advice, and observation of what works and what doesn't when it comes to engaging - and even persuading - an audience of people.

From this journey of honing my public speaking style, I created simple checklists and prep guides for myself.  Now, I'm not only back to feeling at home on a stage (though thankfully not singing or dancing anymore), I love the energy from these interactions. 

Here are the three most effective practices that I added to my presentation prep.  Try these to add clarity, audience engagement, and persuasion to your communication.

1. Start with a compelling story. Our brains are hardwired to make connections through stories, so starting with a relevant story will help others remember what you said and create an emotional connection with them right from the beginning.  Bonus: when you start with an engaged audience, it builds confidence for the rest of the talk.

2. Practice makes permanent. Rehearse what you are going to say over and over until it feels natural and second-nature to you. I've found this prep sheet for TED speakers to be instrumental in helping me prepare and practice in a constructive way.  Bonus: when your content becomes second nature to you, it's easy to ad lib, veer off course a bit, or lose your place because your brain will go right back to where you need to be when you're done with your unplanned comments.

3. Involve your audience. People love to feel that they are part of a presentation, and it takes pressure off you as the speaker to fill the time or only talk about your data/findings/experience.  Whether that is asking your audience questions, sharing a story about someone in the audience (especially someone that many people in the audience know), or planting questions with people in advance to get the conversation going, getting your audience involved makes it an interactive and engaging conversation among people.

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